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Ever since I moved to Switzerland in 1991, after having lived almost twenty years in California, people occasionally ask, Is there something you miss? Well, I certainly don't miss the traffic jams on the grotesquely overloaded freeways, nor the weird people who made their home in the Sausalito post office and hit me up for spare change when I checked my mailbox at three in the morning, nor the moonbat politics and self-righteous politicians, nor the tax Nazis who make the IRS look like a huggable teddy bear

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(FWIW, black tie isnt even the most formal echelon of formal attire, white tie isbut unless youre British royalty, youre probably not going to have to worry about it.) For more style intel to help you crush the spring nuptials circuit, check out the GQ Wedding Style Shop

Dried mustard powder works well, too